7th
Moving On Up
I am moving next Thursday. Thank god.
The peculiar thing about the month before moving, but after telling your landlord that you’re not sticking around, is that real estate brokers just show up at any and all times of the day to show strangers the apartment. Even if you’re still in it. In your pajamas. Writing a term paper.
Now, I get that the landlord wants to find new tenants, but this is not cool.
The awkwardness is aided by the fact that my apartment is in a prime off-campus-but-still-close-to-campus location so the only people who come to see it are Columbia kids. And I might not have a lot of friends at Columbia, but I know some people. And I don’t want to have to show my apartment to them when I’m in my pajamas, writing a paper.
My revenge? I don’t mention the impenetrable darkness, that sometimes the bathroom light turns off while you’re in the shower and scares the crap out of you, that the morbidly obese next door neighbor likes to walk the halls in his underwear calling for his cat, that that same neighbor has an odor like you wouldn’t believe, or that the apartment is directly next door to the football frat so you hear roaring renditions of “Living on a Prayer” day in and day out.
The next tenants can figure out that stuff on their own. As for me, I’m moving to a place with a dishwasher. And windows.